Halloween 2014: Mulan

Okay. I know this blogpost is a little late but better late than never. (: 

This year, I dressed up as Mulan. (I’m a bit too dark for her haha, but it’s fall and it’s going to eventually get cooler here and my skin will pale a bit.) Thank you mom for making this costume for me. 

Courtesy to PicLab for helping me make this (I'm not sponsored by them by the way, but they helped me make this  ^  so...)

Hope you liked this little blogpost and maybe I'll post another one of these Halloween blogposts next year!

xx

Signs a Girl Likes You: My POV

I need to expel all this gushy crud out of my system so that I can focus on me. You might think: How would it help you if you write about it on your blog? Won't you just dwell on x topics more? Well for right now it's really helping me and to whoever out there is reading my blog, thank you for tolerating this (:

Here are a few signs I may like you- either that or I really don't like you. 

• I will glance at you a lot (or it means I don't like you OR I much enjoy bugging you. i.e. my friend Adam.)
• I will be extremely mean to you. (or I don't like you.) I don't know why, but I guess it's to hide the fact that I really do enjoy your company. Of course, after my brash tone of voice and negative connotations, they don't stick around for long. Can we agree that I might actually be one of those #catlady's? Just kiddING, I like dogs more than cats.
• I will unintentionally levitate towards you. And when I realize I'm doing that, I'm going to like WHOAH 'scuse me, I'm supposed to be going THE OTHER way.
• I might talk to your guy friends.
• When I see you, I tend to become very self conscious about my hair. I'll probably let it fall forward to cover my face or I'll constantly comb it back for more volume.
• I tend to be quiet around you.
• I'll be very sensitive around you. 
• NOTE: The last two bullet points- that's before you start talking to me, or I make a side comment that triggers a convo that stimulates me being unconditionally rude. 
• I'll instantaneously become envious of any girl you talk to. (I've been doing that less it's alright. Some of them are actually pretty nice.)
• I'll become very aware of who talk to you and what you talk about. (Stalker mode: ON.)
• If I have a crush on you, like I REALLY like you. I don't tend to get over it very quickly. The shortest amount of time I've liked someone is probably a month. The only reason I liked him was because he was a fast runner :P . The longest I've liked someone is two years. (He had a girlfriend he ******** and he also watches **** so... I've come to realize his true colors. Heh.)
• I'll find some way to subtly bring you up in convos. If my friends bring you up into a convo I'll listen to every single they have to say about you.
• If my friends know, and you're around they'll probably point you out (no-so-)modestly and they'll giggle a lot and I'll look stormy and embarrassed. 

So there you go. Am I ashamed of putting this online? Frankly: Yes, but this blog is really helping me overcome all these little conflicts that keep batting me left and right, prying me for my individual attention. 

xx

Signs a Boy Likes You: According to my Guy Friends

Here is a small collection of advice that a guy likes you by my guy friends: (note: not boyfriends haha.) (This isn't going to be helpful by the way)

Joe:

• "Maybe he kinda likes you because sometimes I stare at h/n when she smiles."

Adam:

• The WAY they talk to you.
• WHAT they say to you.

Jimmy:

• (Pull a 'Sherlock' and) DEDUCT.

Gerth:

• "JUST ASSUME HE DOESN'T LIKE YOU AND IF HE DOES THE BONUS."

My Discovery Phase, Boys

I wasn't really planning to do a blogpost on this but I really need to get all this confusing energy out of my system, because it's twisting and writhing inside me, and it's really not great. 

In middle school, I was a very angry person. That then lead to me feeling very sad and alone no matter how many people I had around me. I wanted to be alone, I didn't want to talk out my feelings with anyone which made it worse because I was wallowing in my own fear. This got worse as I entered high school because I was in the middle of two really great groups of friends but my personality had both groups of friends in them, so I was never really one or another. I'm still in that mess. 

This eventually lead to me having this discovery phase which I am still in right now. Let me tell you, it takes up a lot of time. I'm always having these random epiphanies and I end up contemplating the meaning of life or love or whatever instead of paying attention to what's going on, which is bad. Why? Because my attention lasts about as long as a dog. 

Anyways, because of this self discovery phase, I feel as if I need to really focus on myself. I know it sounds really selfish, but it's true. I need to focus on school, protecting my family and friends, discovering myself, and also come to realizations about the world that will help me in the future. Now, this will not work out very well if a boy comes into play. 

For a moment in my life, it got better because of my best friend Audrey. I gave her a list of potential guys I might like and she told me to rate them by personality and looks. I found that I only really potentially like these boys because they were cute (of course).

PAUSE: I mean guys, let's face it, the "Personality is everything" thing is phony. We all go for looks first- don't be fooled though- if you're a *****, then you're gonna get dropped like a hot potato. 

Anyways, I realized that I didn't really know any of these guys. I didn't know their academic life, their personality, or who they even hung out with. So in a matter of days, I kind of dropped all my feelings for them. But wait. I said that boy-free zone only lasted for a moment. Raging hormones ugh.

As life progressed little by little, my eye caught a dude. Um. Let's call him Geff. He's cute (has a dimple like zayummm), he has a pretty good build, he's pretty smart, he's athletic, and he seems pretty chill. This guy- Geff- keeps interfering with my me time and it's really bugging me but I can't just let him go; feelings just don't work that way. I once had a crush on a guy for two years with the same traits that this Geff guy has.

The best thing I could do was vent about all this stuff building up inside me. I vented about my discovery phase and him to my friends, my best friend who's more like a non-blood sister. Now, did that help? Well (Wow. No joke, I just shuffled my ipod and 'Can't Help Falling in Love' started playing) not really. If anything, I seemed to only like him more. Him invading my me time isn't the only problem though. Here are some other reasons:

• He's popular so girls left and right like him too
• My friend Suri told me that he's really 'close' with this one girl, he's 'considering' a friend of Suri's, and he seems really bonded with this girl in one of the classes I see him in.
• My friend Suri has a friend who really likes him. Like head over heels for him. Like obsessive like him. So I find that liking him is going against my morals.

I don't really know what to do. This is all really difficult and I just don't have time for this. If you're in the same conundrum as me though, may I advice you:

• Friends are people you don't have to impress because they love you for who you are. 
• If they're really your friend, they won't let you become this crazy clingy beast.
• When you talk about your feelings with your friends/family, you should be able to trust them FULLY. You should expect advice not just criticism. Also, unleash everything; it will make you feel so much better. BUT:
• When you're talking about a guy that you MAY end up liking but you don't want to like, don't talk about how adorable he is and don't speak about him in a really gushy way, it really doesn't help anyone. 
• If you have any questions that revolve around this topic, I'd feel free to answer them and possibly help you. (:

I probably sound like a damsel in distress. Desperate. A cat lady. Haha, aw well.

xx

Movie Review: Interstellar

Interstellar with Matthew McConaughey and Anne Hathaway (with some special guest stars ( (;) is a two hour forty minute movie. Is it worth it?

Well, I’m going to be brutally honest. Towards the middle of the movie I well… I kind of fell asleep. The movie from start to finish was pretty confusing and had this undercurrent of supernatural- no joke, they had the word ‘tesseract’ in it, and because the movie was about trying to find a new world to live in, I expected them to find Asgard and meet Loki and Thor (SPOILER: They didn’t… Unfortunately).

This movie isn’t only about trying to find a new galaxy though, it’s a movie about love. Not goopy teenage/desperate cat lady love, no, but a father daughter love between Cooper (Matthew McConaughey)  and Murph (Mackenzie Foy at the beginning of the movie) and Anne Hathaway’s character and Michael Caine’s character. Because of this, it made the movie all the more interesting and kept you on your toes. Will Cooper and Anne Hathaway’s character see their daughter or father again? With no shame, I will admit I cried on and off throughout the movie when I was awake.

The movie has death, love, mystery, and action and if I had to rate it out of one hundred percent: 70%

Jonathan Nolan and Christopher Nolan, the screenwriters of this movie deserve a round of applause for creativity. The film was confusing at times but everything was so stellar (pun intended) looking- the world and outer space and the screen write was phenomenal. The directing was on point (Christopher Nolan), so much so that the eerie tone of the movie carried out of the cinema and into my soul until now.

xx