As I am growing up, I am making new friends but I am also losing a lot of friends- no, no I'm not getting into physical or verbal fights with them and we end up nasty enemies, rather we fade away.
So here I am about to vent, and if you don't like reading about these kind of things, I suggest you leave now please. (:
I am not going to use the real names of my friends as that would be disrespectful, so of course, I will use code names alright? :D
About my best and closest group of friends:
I have been doing a lot of thinking this summer and not only because I'm taking a geometry course. "Why have you been thinking deeply, Joey? It's summer, you should be dilly-dallying about!" Well, it's because of geometry. I am taking this class with a few of my closest friends and I'm really not sure we're as close anymore.
I have this one friend, let's call her 'Ray', and she is very in fact opinionated. She always NEEDS to be right and she is stubborn- possibly more stubborn than me if possible! I have uncovered that about her over this summer because I am spending more time with her. Being correct is like... her life source, and it makes me want to tear out my hair because OPINIONS ARE PERSONAL, AND THEY'RE YOUR PREFERENCE, YOU NEED NOT INTRUDE WITH THEM. But she does and it drives my crazy. When she or anyone else proves her wrong she curses at us or says 'whatever' and it makes me insane. I don't know, Ray was never a really close friend, I only befriended her because my best friend was BFF's with her. I knew I should never have trusted Ray but I tried and tried... And now I'm regretting it lots.
Now, onto another friend of mine. My best friend. Also Ray's best friend. Let's call her Adele. My friend that I consider more a younger yet taller and more mature sister of mine once told me we would never last, but of course I ignored her. I tried to make things work between us and... things did for a while, but everything is crashing down upon us. She's angry at me because I've made knew friends I think and seems to be taking sides with Ray whenever Ray lectures me (because she NEEDS to be right) and it seems like my best and closest group of friends are all ganging up on me and I'm suffocating. See, Adele never did that before so...
And now my 'sister', let's call her Sapphire. She threw herself inside my walls without knowing what she was getting into by trying to befriend me and I'd like to kudos her for not leaving me in the past few years. I don't know... There's not much to complain about with her. She's not even considered my bestie anymore, rather my sister. She gives me advice about the other people I hang out with and she's usually right. I really need to listen to her more. The only thing is, she's brutally honest.
They all are too honest- Ray, Adele, and Sapphire- and I partially blame myself because I am as well. We really need to learn how to pick and choose our words better. But... I am a naturally fairly placid person and I can't deal with their honesty and brutality sometimes... A lot of the times. Sapphire once called me 'soft spoken' and that is true. She mentioned that I should stick to my newer friends because they're less harsh but I don't know. These group of people will probably be the best group of friends I will ever have and I don't want to let them go.
I've made a new friend and we've learned something about a mutual friend of ours:
We shall call her Cate. This girl... Cate, Sapphire warned me about her. She warned me that she was going to throw me away like trash, that she was rude and that she wasn't a keeper. Of course, being the "smart" person I am, I dismissed Sapphire. But Cate has made new friends, more popular friends and it really does seem like she is throwing me away. I get that you need to spend time with your new friends, but she rarely talks to me anymore and she's so much more... Candid and not in a good way, and she really hurts people without knowing it. Of course, being the person I am, I confronted her but she hasn't done anything and it rips my heart a little.
What else have I learned about her? Well, while taking geometry, I made a new friend- let's call her Lucky. Lucky and I are both friends with Cate. We've spent a lot of time together this summer and we've learned that Cate copy and pastes her messages to all her contacts. I mean, I guess it is alright to tell exciting-ish (not really) news to all your friends but don't copy and paste! Say it a little different to your friends and maybe we'd be less angry at you...
Also, she always obsesses over BOYS, her crushes. I tolerate it of course being her friend, but honestly? She talks about how she's 'broken-hearted' and how she 'breaks down in tears' whenever she sees him with a certain girl, but WE'VE JUST GOTTEN OUT OF MIDDLE SCHOOL for peets-sake! Middle school crushes and relationships are bullshit! Okay, sometimes I talk about my crushes and things but I don't constantly rant about them. And Cate of course gives me a reality check which I am grateful for, but whenever I give her one she gets mad at me... LIKE SERIOUSLY GIRL.
And she fangirls A LOT... And about the same people over and over again.. For the past what, two years? EVERY. SINGLE. FREAKING. DAY. I cope with it, but it's starting to get old and just... stop, please, give a break for at least a week? PLEASE.
She also has a certain body shape- the twig. And she obsesses about how fat her thighs are... I just want to say, "Bro. Whenever, I see you run, I hope that your legs don't break, so shush." She complains about how she hates when people say they are 'ugly' or 'fat' but she says the same thing. She fishes for compliments and she hates when people fish for compliments. She's a hypocrite. Of course, all people are in some way, but please don't obsess about how fat you are when you way eighty pounds and the size of your thighs are half my thighs.
Okay, that's it for now. If you liked this, that's cool I suppose :P and if you think I am a complete brat, I am sorry, I'm just venting and people need to that at one point in their lives before they explode and my ranting just happened to be on my blog in public.
See you soon! xx
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